THE CONVERSATION “So tell me Mary, how important is this step in life to you?” “It is the single most important thing in my life right now.” “You want to look the best you can?” “Oh yes!” You want to feel happier and healthier than you have felt in a long time, possibly ever?” “Absolutely!”… Keep Reading
STAND UP FOR WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN – Part 1
THE CONVERSATION
“So tell me Mary, how important is this step in life to you?”
“It is the single most important thing in my life right now.”
“You want to look the best you can?”
“Oh yes!”
You want to feel happier and healthier than you have felt in a long time, possibly ever?”
“Absolutely!”
“Do you want to change your life in the most positive way you can?”
“Oh yes, I really, really do.”
“So are you ready to become the person in charge of your life. Are you ready to put in the time and the effort it takes to engage in a program that will change you from the inside out?”
“Well, sure. I mean, I hope I will be. You see, I have kids. Really can’t stay that much away from home.”
“But you do realize that dedicating time to getting healthier, stronger and happier will be good for you kids in the long run, right Mary?”
“And I would need to consult with my husband.”
“What would you need to ask him about? I am assuming he wants the best for you, doesn’t he?”
“Plus I hope I will be strong enough to lift all those weights.”
“I haven’t mentioned all those weights, Mary.”
“You know, so many things in my life to keep up with.”
Did you see what just happened in this conversation?
Read on, and I will explain.
ARE YOU IN CHARGE?
Who is The Boss in YOUR life?
Is it you?
Or is it someone else?
I think this is one really important question we all have to ask ourselves.
You see, we have just hosted our Re-Invention Week and I was busy meeting people who wanted to make changes happen in their lives.
Unlike most other places in our line of work, we love to sit down with our potential clients and get to know them BEFORE we start them off.
Before we even ask them for any money.
This is not only fair to the client, but also fair to us.
That way, we won’t start off someone who is programmed to fail and we won’t be giving anyone any false expectations.
It saves both of us unnecessary stress and more importantly, wasted time, in the long run.
Other places will just start you off and then come what may.
With them, it’s a numbers game.
The more people they sign up, the more money they make.
Once your name is on the dotted line, it’s your problem, Jack and Jill.
Oh sure, they may provide you with their standard program and directions – but how many walk with you all the way?
We like to do things better than that.
We love to communicate with people.
And we love to take care of people.
During our first meeting, all the potential clients we talked to were adamant about wanting to change.
They were tired of being fat, tired of how it made them feel and tired of the general sadness they had in their lives.
So, they would do anything, absolutely anything, to change that.
Or so they said.
So far, on the surface, it all looked good.
However, surface waters are usually not a mirror of what lies beneath.
Our interviews are geared to probe deeper than what people’s official answers usually hold, so we can bring things that are hidden beneath up to the light.
And, one disturbingly common factor cropped up every time we did this.
(And we noted that women are especially more prone to this problem than men are.)
THE DEMONS INSIDE
When we explained to people that the changes they were looking for would have to require changes in their established ways of thinking, and how these changes would require them to cut off all external excuses, a large proportion of them became hesitant.
A very important point to note here is that the first changes we point out are NOT lifestyle changes.
Changes in one’s way of life can only happen AFTER changes in one’s way of thinking.
This is highlighted when consider the following situation.
We have several people coming in from other programs – even programs where they have successfully lost weight – where they are still as unhappy with themselves as they were BEFORE the program (and even the weight loss).
Why should something like this happen?
Because, the weight loss is not really the point of ANYONE’s decision of starting a fitness program
People are not unhappy with the way they LOOK.
People are unhappy with the way they FEEL about themselves.
It’s a simple distinction, but it makes a monumental difference in the long term success of any transformation.
Fixing how people feel about themselves is, in fact, the ONLY way to secure a life-long transformation, something that can be sustained when the program is long over.
The way that people look is mostly a reflection of how they feel about themselves.
It is actually the result of a problem, and not the cause.
Most training programs – yes, including those hyped up, glitzy ones you see on TV – will ONLY treat the result of the problem (the client’s weight) and not what is causing it.
It makes for a great show and great (misleading) advertising, but it doesn’t really address the crisis in any effective way.
DRILLING IT DOWN TO THE CORE
What our conversations with our clients have shown over the years is that a disconcerting amount of people (again, our data shows women seem to suffer from this more than men) are not really in control of their own lives.
They go through the motions, they state they are in control, and they may even believe that they are the ones calling the shots, but, in reality, they are not.
This doesn’t mean that someone else is controlling their life.
What we have actually found out is that their problems are actually caused by…themselves!
Along the years, people have created these negative energies in their minds and hearts that slowly but surely, destroy everything good they have inside.
These black vortexes are contributed to by family, friends and society.
Yes, even by those with the best intentions in the world.
But, as I am sure you know, the road to hell itself is paved with good intentions.
And good intentions are to be avoided like the plague.
THE SCARY PART
Now, want to know something really terrifying?
We ALL have these demons inside us!
Yes, even the most successful of all people do.
We might not have seen them, but we definitely have heard them talking to us at some point or other in our lives.
These are some of the things they say.
“Don’t even try that. You are not good enough!”
“No one else is saying anything. Why should you be the only one to object?”
“He/she is not going to look at you twice. Why should they? You’re fugly”!
“That really pretty girl is going to get the job. She looks a lot better than you do.”
“Why should you stand up and say something? They are all going to laugh at you!”
“I ate a piece of cake today. Damn, I’m such a loser!”
Do these sound familiar?
If you are really and truly honest with yourself – of course they do.
These are the demons inside, whispering darkness into our ears.
Destroying our judgment, our sense of self, our confidence, our ability to be strong and, finally, when left to weak their havoc unchallenged, all our chances of happiness.
COMING UP…
In Stand Up For What You Believe In – Part 2 of this double article we are going to find out what it takes to stand up and fight back. We will talk about the best (and fastest) way to become the best version of yourself you can ever be. That’s the glamorous ,charming, successful and composed person you have always dreamt about. But be ready to put your gloves on. Because getting the life you want is going to take a lot more than just wishful thinking and lofty plans.
Let’s rock it.
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